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I walked across the playground, holding back my tears. I knew they were watching. I remember thinking, ‘if they can’t see how much I’m hurting, it isn’t real’.
I got very good at being ‘fine’.
‘I’m just not an angry person’, I used to say, and I believed myself.
My mum turned up at school one day to find the other girls running and laughing, and me with the blotchy face I still get when I cry.
‘The only reason anyone will ever hate you is because they’re jealous’, I can still hear my dad saying.
Well-meaning and said with love, but to that little girl, what that meant was:
Make sure you don’t shine too bright, and you’ll avoid this pain.
My Soul, though, had other plans. It’s not up for fitting in and getting by. It’s certainly not up for mundane monotony and perfect on the outside. It wants to feel all the feelings. It wants adventure. Growth. Deep and meaningful connections. Raucous laughter. It wants lots of space. It wants to dance with wild-abandon. It wants Ocean-swimming, feet-in-warm-sand, fire-gazing, giggling joy.
My Soul came here to shine bright.
There was a lot of unlearning to be done.
‘And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom’
~ Anais Nin
I trained as a yoga teacher, I went travelling, learnt reiki, colour, chakra and crystal healing. I was silent for 10 days on Vipassana (twice) and found enough inner-space to start to notice my thoughts, to start to choose. I learnt to hear my wise inner voice over the racket of all the other voices. I journeyed with Jewels Wingfield on a yearlong exploration of the Sacred Feminine and learnt in-depth about feminine leadership and holding space while assisting her on the same journey a few years later.
I have women in my life now with whom I can cry and shout and they love me even more each time. Becoming Real is the greatest gift I’ve given myself. I let go of trying to fix anything, trying to be ‘better’… and started focusing on just being me.
It feels really good.
It took a lot of unlearning, unravelling, saying things before I knew if I believed them to see how they tasted – and the joy, the pleasure, the power – real, inner power – on the other side – or in-side – is so immense, I can’t not share about it.
Because what I’ve come to know is that when we bury our anger, we bury our ecstasy and power. And when we hold back our sadness, we hold back our joy.
I started to share all of who I really am with close friends, private clients and in my intimate group, The Beacons Sisterhood. I stopped compartmentalising myself and brought my fun, quirky, colourful, highly intuitive, visionary, wildly creative, intelligent and joyful self into my business.
Turns out, trying to fit in is not only the way to a slow soul-death, it’s also a terrible business strategy for an entrepreneur.
When I finally dared to say: This is Who I Am, This is How Much I Feel, and This is What I Stand For. Without Apology.
That’s when everything changed.
Not overnight, because, you know that’s a myth right?
More like subtle shifts (or shoves) and a few (sometimes scary) leaps into Alignment.
It started to feel like fun. It started – and still feels – like the grand adventure my soul always wanted.
It feels deeply fulfilling and energising.
Because what I’ve realised is.
The greatest form of Self-Care is Self-Expression.
Infact, it’s all your Soul really wants.
For you to be who you really are.
For you to shine your quirky light, unapologetically.
Weird, quirky, full-on or quiet, you’re not ‘too much’ and you’re 100% enough.
I know the pain of feeling like you can’t express yourself. I really, really get it.
And, I know that on the other side of letting go of worrying what people will think, lives Joy.
That’s why everything I do is with the intention to support you to to stand in the centre of your own life, and dare to share your true, wild-hearted, unapologetic voice with the world.
The fine art of Being You in a world that tries to confine and define you, is an adventure worth going on. I’m here to support you on that adventure, if you need me.
Spending a whole day working with Kate on my signature speech was amazing! It was such a nourishing and wonderful day and helped me hone in on the exact story I needed to tell – I know now that it is that story, right on the edge, that is the one I need to share at this point in my business – the one that will connect with the women I am here to help. It felt SO GOOD to have someone there who hears me and gets me … Then came actually sharing my new speech on stage. I’ve done talks before, but this was the most personal. It felt amazing to let go of a layer of my old ‘showbiz’ persona on stage, that wasn’t supporting where I want to go anymore. Just being me on stage and sharing my story felt really powerful and I got some amazing feedback, a speaker video made and a new client! Such a relief to have my new signature speech written, practiced and performed! (phew!) Thank you SO MUCH Kate.
~ Kate Gerry
The 'Official' Bit
Kate Wolf is a catalyst for creative self-expression and Businesses that beam with personality.
She works exclusively with change-makers, healers, seers, pioneers, sensitive and creative souls – people who are here to make a difference. She does this privately and in workshops and retreats, as well as in her lovingly created Beacons Sisterhood, where bright lights gather to make sure they burn bright – not out. She brings years of experience as an intuitive energy healer, reiki master, yoga and meditation teacher and creativity expert to clear blocks to healthy self-expression and support clients to speak their truth. With a vast understanding of effective communication from work in the theatre and Creative Education – directing, writing, performing and teaching – Kate transforms bland messaging into stories that connect – from both the page and the stage. Kate has spoken and inspired on stages in the US and the UK, including Inspire’d London, the UK’s leading platform for inspirational and transformational talks, and Connect in New Orleans, where the world’s best transformational leaders gather.
As a One of Many™ Certified Women’s Coach, Kate will support you to lead- your life, your business, your home – from a place of SoftPower- no more SuperWoman!
If you know your work is about more than just making money – if it’s about starting a movement, lighting a way for a new world, taking a stand for something bigger than yourself – Kate Wolf will support you to own your magic, free your voice and shine your quirky light – so that those who need you, find you.